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200+ Japanese brides entered US last year. More are expected to come this year. How do I find a Japanese wife & is it even worth it? We have answers.
It may seem that Japan has always been a homogeneous society where intermarriages were stigmatized. In fact, historically, it was one of the first countries where local mail-order brides, or “picture brides”, to be exact, started building relationships with foreigners.
But let’s leave the past in the past and talk about modern Japanese mail-order brides. Who are they, what do they expect to find in their future husbands, and what is the family life with a Japanese wife even like? You’ll find all the answers here.
What you should know before ordering a Japanese bride?
Before we start discussing more specific aspects of finding a wife in Japan, let’s take a look at a few key facts you just have to know before you start your dating journey.
- Japanese women are known for their wisdom, intelligence, inner and outer beauty, strong family values, perfect parenting skills, ambition, spontaneity, and even a bit of childishness.
- The term “Japanese mail-order bride” is rather an archaism that people keep using for multiple reasons. We say “order a bride” but no one literally orders a bride. In reality, a man doesn’t buy a Japanese wife—he meets her, builds a relationship with her, and marries her if everything goes right.
- A couple always meet in person before they officially get married. In most cases, a man goes to Japan to meet his long-distance girlfriend.
- A Japanese mail-order wife doesn’t get any financial compensation for her decision to marry a foreign man. A man, in turn, pays only for online dating services, trips, visas, etc. In some cases, couples even share expenses.
- A Japanese wife must not meet certain criteria, for example, be submissive and obedient to her husband. A relationship with a foreign partner you’ve met online is still a relationship, and it can be different.
So, these were the basics. If you’re still interested, just read on. We’re going to share more important information in the following paragraphs.
Who is a Japanese mail-order bride and what does she do?
Here’s one simple thing we’d like to emphasize. Modern Japanese brides you can meet online are very different from brides of the past. It’s crucially important to consider the actual meaning, which is as follows:
“A Japanese mail-order bride is a single woman you can meet online, on one of the niche websites designed exclusively for Asian brides and Westerners who’d like to date and marry them. In most cases, this is a woman in her 30s expecting to get married and start a family in the short term, ideally, a year or two. Most women have never been married previously, but there are divorced women with children, too.
A modern bride isn’t motivated by money or the fact of migration as is. Japanese women for marriage aren’t paid by agencies, websites, or their potential husbands. A man pays only for online dating services if he chooses a premium dating site. Also, a typical bride is 100% motivated to build a genuine relationship with a man, meet him in person, and marry him only if they may have a good future together.”
Basically, that explains what a Japanese bride does. She’s intentionally looking for a foreign husband for her own reasons (we’re going to discuss them in more detail below), wants to find a really compatible partner, and is ready to migrate if everything works. However, if you want to better understand this phenomenon, we’d also recommend you take a look at the list of things a Japanese mail-order bride definitely doesn’t do.
Japanese mail-order wives don’t:
- Participate in any illegal activity, arranged marriages, human trafficking, etc.
- Make a decision to search for a husband abroad under pressure
- Agree to marry a foreigner just because he’s rich or lives in a certain country
- Become entirely dependent on their husbands and obedient to them
There are a lot of myths about this business and mail-order brides themselves, but once you find out how everything works, it’s much easier for you to develop the right strategy.
Why Japanese women become mail-order brides
Isn’t it all about money? Not really. In most cases, Japanese women explain their choice by the following:
- Attraction to foreign men which is pretty common in Japan
- Adventurousness, desire to see the world and try to live in a completely different country
- Desire and pressure to get married and start a family
- Not the best previous relationship experiences, disappointment in local partners
Often, it’s not just one reason but a combination of different factors, but as you can see, there’s nothing somehow related to financial motivation or desire to migrate to another country at all costs.
What it’s like to be married to a Japanese bride
You can find a Japanese wife online rather easily if you choose the right site and develop a good strategy. The question, however, is whether that’s what you really need or not.
Of course, we can’t just describe everyone’s wife from Japan. Every human being is unique, and even the cultural environment can make us the same.
Still, we can collect feedback, do research, and distinguish some cultural peculiarities. In particular, most men who’ve already married Japanese women agree on the following:
- She will keep her own identity. Don’t expect a Japanese woman to become an American, British, Canadian, or Australian one day. That’s not going to happen. Also, your children will know a lot about Japan and Japanese culture.
- She’s likely to be very supportive. When you’re a couple, you’re a couple. There are common problems and common achievements.
- Being a mother is actually more important. Speaking of children, for many girls from Japan, their role as a mom matters more than their role as a wife. That may result in problems, but the best way to cope with them will be to compromise and negotiate.
- Most Japanese women have phenomenal cooking skills. There are exceptions, of course, but it’s really common.
That’s what makes marriages with Japanese women special for most men. Is that what you’ve been looking for? If so, you’ll really have a great chance of finding love in this country.